Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
evidently tequilla and lady gaga make me flirt and grind shamlessly with other men infront of my boyfriend.
someone called me shannon dorrhety annnd it hurt my feelingsd.
are you so shy because you have an std?
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
I literally sat down and peed with my underwear still on. How does that happen?
just looked in the mirror, I fell asleep with a face mask on. At least drunk me cares that much about the condition of my skin
Afraid I'm about to get arrested. Complicated situation but not a joke. If I do not text again that all is clear within 90 minutes kindly begin bail process. I have the cash to repay as soon as I get home. Details later.
I just had a dream that I was pulling you around downtown on a sled, from bar to bar. Dear lord if we start that there's no hope for us
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
One day i'll wow you with artfully trimmed pubes.
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
The guy I hooked up with two weeks ago just friended me on Venmo, I honestly won't be mad if he pays me for the sex
I'm on a party bus with a stripper pole with middle aged women who have all started drinking
God bless your soul.
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize
