Ikea night.
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Insert tab A into swedish slot B
I wasted my skinny years on you. The least you can do is high five me at the bar
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
you puked on the porch, i can see your jacket on the floor next to your underwear. i know your home, unchain the door, you're the worst roommate ever.
Watch the news tonight. They interviewed me about a fire. I was high as balls so it should be entertaining.
Doing lines off a plate that says, "things go better with coke."
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
And then after we fucked he wouldn't stop calling me "champ". It was like I had sex with an extremely attractive soccer coach
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
We're about to get drunk and it feels wrong without you
Is it sad that the most attractive guy I've come across in a week that's not my professor is the man doing my pedicure?
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