And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
Chillin with my Grandpa and my grandma tells us there is a tornado warning. My grandpa then says "We'll go hang out in the basement, we can bring the keg with us." This is why I love coming home
The cop told me to answer for everyone if there was drinking involved and then i threw up in my Luigi's italian ice that i was eating with a pizza slicer
I NEED YOU HERE TO KNOCK THE MALT BEVERAGES OUT OF MY MOUTH
Tried to drunkenly hop a fence with my cast on to get away from the cops but ended up falling over a bench.. how do I explain those bruises to my parents?
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
I'm so confused as to where the sexual euphemisms end and the drinking starts
She jumped on a table and took off her shirt and started yelling things that no one understood. For being 3, she has a dead on impression of a drunk party girl.
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
All our friends are getting married, and I'm the dateless guy bringing molly to their weddings.
sometimes i like to lay one the floor and pretend im a carrot.
I woke up with an eye patch on, someone else's sweatshirt on, and no pants on. I hope it was a good night.
Randomize
