we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
you were carrying a trash bag around insisting it was your purse. I'll let you guess how your night went
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
everything was going well until edgar threatened to handcuff the security guard to himself.
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
Ok. I am hammered I will admit it but my legacy needs to live and your the only woman that could spawn satan. We need to talk.
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
if my uterus stops caving in on itself long enough for me to be alive I'm there
After we finished having sex, he drunkenly tried to hugh five me, farted, then accused me of stealing his socks.
Did you know that chef boy-ar-dee was a real person? I watched a show about him. the history of the ravioli is more scandalous than you would think.
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
Randomize
