im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.
that would combine my 3 fave things. christmas funfetti and paul simon
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
I now realize that they made gum to take the taste of dick out of your mouth.
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
Like I couldn't describe it to you but if they did a lineup of penises i'd be able to pick it out.
i think i broke my dog last night...fuck
I just...no. You make my soul cry. You are giving me karma-cancer. This torture of my majesticness can no longer be tolerated.
Eredayimstrugglin ..Can we talk about the fact that I just typed "er" and it autocorrected to that. Fuck my life.
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
Im pretty sure breakfast wine is a thing, and if it isn't, I just invented it
We shall need something stronger. Anal lube, the blood of a giraffe, and a bay leaf should do the trick. Make the paste and cover your left knee and anus in it.
You guys do the cocaine and I'll do the dishes.
Randomize
