I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
I'm so over stopping myself from talking about my sexual experiences in front of children.
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
New low: just got woken up by my 9 year old cousin throwing an empty at me and telling me to get my life together.
well his attempt to make a white russian with instant coffee, gone off milk, and that weird probably illegal vodka we bought the other day isnt going well
Just to let you know... If you ever want to get me a gift, the One Direction perfume comes out soon....... It's called Our Moment. It's an appropriate gift for a 25 year old woman.
I'm working on a search warrant...can u pick up box of Chardonnay...I'll give u cash when u get here...
Yea... I love that ur a prosecutor and drink box wine
I'm pretty sure male strippers are the last things I need in my life right now.
I felt like a responsible adult. A responsible adult that may or may not end up shitfaced. But not heaving purple puke into a urinal like last time because I'm classy now.
He lasted less than 30 sec. in bed and then sent me a friend request on LinkedIn. Wtf.
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
Randomize
