Can Purell be used as lube?
ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
I've broken several federal laws in the name of sex.
i thought they made a 7-hour walmart run, but they were actually in jail.
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
I'm sorry I didn't respond. I had a shit day. However, I just masturbated to Adele's Rolling In the Deep while crying. It was oddly therapeutic.
Do you realize half our text conversations are you asking me for tit pics and me saying no?
I just Miyagied my roommate through her first set of tit pics. Her fuck buddy owes me.
I'm to the point of desperation where I stare at customers penis imprints through their pants all day
Fuck it, I'm going to make my own dick pic album since iOS 10 won't do it for me.
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
My GF, FWB and Side piece are all booty calling me. I’m a victim of my sexual success
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