I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
i felt like we were having sex on ultimate fighter, and people on the outside kept yelling ELBOW ELBOW! KNEES KNEES!
Why is it that you only get to have sex when you haven't shaved your legs in six weeks and are wearing period stained granny panties?
this just has baby written all over it
Used tampon in my purse. That from you?
The beer is more important than you right now.
I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
I think im drinking tonight later on...which is good cuz i walked pass the liquor aisle the other day and i swear i heard a kid call me a pussy
Ok. I am hammered I will admit it but my legacy needs to live and your the only woman that could spawn satan. We need to talk.
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
the only good thing about going home with him was that he was prettier than me.
omg sorry but i tried to stop you when you were at your drunk limit but i took my eyes off you for like 2 seconds and you suddenly appeared with hard liquor in both hands for yourself and downed them and it was downhill from there
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
I woke up handcuffed to a bed wearing nothing but an army belt. Does this count as thanking our country?
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