matts gf stood and watched my naked ass gather my clothes off his floor this morning. sweet.
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
there's no toilet paper. I'm using wheat bread.
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
I've decided I want to blow you wearing a santa hat.
Aren't rabbit ears more seasonally appropriate?
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
I have invented a new game to play on campus. It's called "Mormons or Pledges?" It's fantastic.
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
I just ate your leftovers whilst watching Garfield and Friends. Thank you across the board.
I'm sorry, that really sucks. I'm in the bath eating lasagna and if anyone comes in here it's going to be bad news for them
literally took my pants off in the middle of bourbon last night without taking off my heels im a super human i guess
Shelly has the weirdest luck. Dude offered her a job riding a bucking bronco and it was not porn or stripping but an actual g-d cow.
Randomize
