my little brother just caught me blowing my step cousin in the lobby bathroom at our family reunion
How has he not realized you're pregnant?
Spanx.
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
IDK DUDE BUT HE TIED IT WITH A SHOELACE SO I GOTTA FREE SHOELACE OUTTA THE DEAL. THIS GIVES A NEW MEANING TO LACED DRUGS
Do not shit in our house. There is no TP. I am walking to get more, if I do not return, I have probably died of dysentery after my last wagon wheel got stuck in a gulch. Tell Martha and Lou Ann that I love them, and that I passed away doing the Lord's work.
Adults smoke weed in footie pajamas man. You just gotta accept me for who I am.
I cut myself stripping on your car. Probably a profession I shouldn't pursue
the cops are being surprisingly chill about david hanging from a tree with no pants.
A log hopped out of the fireplace and caught the carpet on fire. Good summary of this election if you ask me.
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
Randomize
