guy from last night has fluorescent crocs in his closet. judging by the rest of his clothes he doesn't wear them in an ironic way
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
He told the cop he was underage, handed the cop his ID, and the police report read "I then informed the suspect that he was not, in fact, underage"
It was awful. Their identical twins so it was like having sex with Jeff wearing a wig and shaved legs.
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
When we missed a fist bump and simultaneously did the Rocket Power handshake I knew I was going to blow him.
Hey, YOU try working out drunk every night! Besides, I think at least one of those bruises is a hickey.
I mean I know I'll get over it by like tonight but ew ew eww. I cannot. Dude I don't even know his name also I threw up on his penis
On the way to have sex with my ex's roommate... I have hit a new low
Get the fuck in, we're going to Taco Bell.
I need a sign that says “please don’t make plans with me if I’ve had two or more drinks. I will regret them. I will have bitter feelings towards you. Then I will cancel and feel guilty.”
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
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