so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
just had dinner with my dad's new gf and her daughter.. had to drink a beer to get through it.. she's 19 she has on a disney watch and snowflake earrings
Today should be called shooting fish in a barrel day. Every place ive gone to ive met a girl who regrets not hooking up last night. There have not been girls this easy since Fathers Day
Is it bad that I was more upset about not getting the perfume he told me he had bought for me then the actual breakup?
Well technically because of daylight savings, I only lasted 15 mintues.
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
The front desk girl just had that condescending welcome-home-from-your-walk-of-shame face on
It was probably because you set your bra on the couter while you found your ID...
I didn't realize how drunk I was until my vagina was in the snow.
My mouth is so dry that I'm about to put a straw in a jar of Vaseline and chug. This all addi diet definitely has its ups and downs.
No one parties "Full Karen". She once broke a couple up at the bar, ate the girl out in the bathroom and took the guy home.
Maybe why that's why I'm perpetually single... I can't find a guy with bigger balls than mine.
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
I just found your "it's drinking time" note in my chem notes. Why did this never happen??
I was waiting for you to find it...I'll be over in 5
Randomize
