Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
I'm blazed at jack in the box and my order number is 420. I wish everything in the world made this much sense.
I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
In the ER with Chelz, I may have broken her ankle during sex. Lovely.
I'm drunk, I'm covered in pizza, and I'm watching Jurassic Park. I feel like you'll get this. xx
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
My makeup bag looks like it has lips and wants to sing to me... Too high?
Last thing I remember I was riding on a picnic table being hauled around by a lawn mower with an empty case of bud light on my head...
You know something is wrong with your lifestyle when you have to clean easy Mac cheese powder off of your scale
at least it's not cocaine like last time
Randomize
