Have fun fixing the bed from last night Bob Villa.
At least you didn't call me Brittany this time
Buhtt sex?
As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
You just begged me to mute the porn and watch her ass bounce while listening to dubstep the whole time.
Being the only sober one.. I had to feed you guys doritos. You kept licking my fingers.
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
It was drunk tag. I was Alice in wonderland chasing a ballerina who was chasing Lance Armstrong who had needles in his arms.
He probably tastes like german chocolate and coffee beans
Seriously though, my ovaries are trying to crawl out of my body and into his pants.
Hey, sorry for threatening to teabag your mom to death last night
Don't worry my mom is buying me a vasectomy for Christmas
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
Randomize
