you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
Putting the hydrocodone in Pez dispensers. Do you want Speedy Gonzales or Darth Vader?
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
I'm going to knit you a pair of furry handcuffs. And you said that knitting class was dumb.
Tonights drinking will be celebratory and victorious. Picture the end of The Mighty Ducks set to beer.
So I feel like I should have had a going away party for your dick. Complete with balloons and cake. Yeahh that's right. I'm gonna miss it.
He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
In local news "Man Stabbed With Golf Club" next person who tells me this is a safe place to live gets punched...
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
You threw a beachball full of vodka at me and yelled I CHOOSE YOU then ran
Is it wrong for me to wish my cat had arms to get me a beer?
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