i want to open my blinds to let the sunlight in my room, but i'm afraid my neighbors will be able to see me drinking and judge me
sometimes you just have to masturbate at your friend's house.
phil was outside the bar last night, sitting on the ground playing songs on a guitar hero guitar to people walking by for money...best version of free bird ever
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
why the fuck does my google maps say i'm in punjab?!?!? u think it has to do with like...outsourcing?
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
Omg cinnamon bun Oreos. Thanks weed
I'm supposed to be at work in 10 min, I just woke up and am 45 min away...tinder for the win
How my distance relationship is going: he's trying to sext me & I'm stuffing pizza in my face.
Omg I just woke up. In the hallway outside my room. I know you had something to do with this
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