you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
She punched my vomit. In midair. Back into my mouth.
We need to buy some popsicles so we can remind ourselves we're good at this.
I have a huge bruise on my thigh that I am 95% sure is due to you repeatedly throwing me over couches.
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
I just did the walk of shame in monkey slippers in the snow
Teach me the song of your people
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
Literally sucked a dick for ten seconds before I said to myself, this tiny ass penis isn't worth it. My night last night
I just left and he walked me out and went call me if you're ever... Eh... Whatever. And walked away.
I have 3 vacation days left and I'm guarding them like a gay dragon on a pile of gold dildos molded after celebrities.
Smaug the FABULOUS
Have you ever thought, hey maybe the reason we were togather that long was because I was drunk the whole relationship?
Randomize
