I have a masturbator in my 5th grade class. the teacher told me ever since they caught him humping the desk in 2nd grade, they haven't been able to control him. he's even on medication but he will just do it in class
i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
Me and my vagina aren't speaking at the moment.
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
I lost my bar virginty and made out with a dwarf. It was a good night
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
I hope a pyrotechnic goes off in your asshole and seals it shut for life.
Me too.
In case you're wondering... Yes walmart will judge you for buying vodka and pickles at 645am.
90% sure I just sold adderall to my professor
100% proud
I only live four blocks from the bar but when you're hammered this walk feels like the journey through Mordor.
Randomize