yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
He said I did a backflip off the thing on the doorframe and busted my ass. I'd give anything to remember
You convinced her to break up with her boyfriend, made out with her all night, got her to buy us all shots then went home with a different girl...
That explains the "i hate you" text. But the facebook deletion is a bit harsh
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
I considered my 2012 starting right when the cop followed the wrong car for the bottle rocket we shot at him
Was having a panic attack, but I'm out of xanax. Substituting with vodka shots and breathing exercises. My therapist will be proud, yes?
There was this blissful moment of peace and quiet... then you ran past our window with a lit firecracker in hand going, "SHIT. SHIT. SHIT!"
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
A party without a piñata is not a party I want to attend.
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
Met the hot new neighbor. She's into country music and giving really good bjs. Latter made up for the former.
Randomize
