If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
you kept saying 'its nothing a six pack wont fix' as they loaded you into the ambulance.
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
Was the mom I hooked up with decently attractive I feel like her two friends were hotter
He scratched off my spray tan. Literal nail marks down my back. Can't imagine what's underneath his fingernails.
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
i told him i should keep a toothbrush at his house for after all the times i threw up there. he said yes but i wasnt getting a key to the apt
What is a foreign vacation of stupidity without some fake names?
Why is it so hot and why are these the only pants in my life.
I just almost puked & then I panicked and forced it back down because I thought I would be a waste of the apple turnover I ate.. I'm that hungover
Omg I can't even...
coughing up blood. I'm leaving for the doctor now. P.S. I just won $350 on the wheel of fortune machine in the casino.
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
Is this like a preordered booty call?
Heard I spat fire in your face last night. Wish I could say that I'm sorry
House vote, we're revoking your 151 privileges
I'm sorry.
We're getting a bucket of chicken and screwing around, so no, you can't join us.
Randomize
