This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
just stared at ed norton's ass for 26 miles. if there was ever an incentive to run a marathon, that was it. my life is perfect.
My dad just knocked on my door and told me that my vibrator was too loud
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
thing about being the result of a teen pregnancy is that all my baby pictures are of my mom and dad holding me around their stoned college friends.
We interrupt your regularly scheduled Saturday morning programming with this important announcement: you are not the father. I repeat not the father. Congratulations and have a nice day.
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
he stopped mid makeout and said "can I pray for you?"
I was on top for a full on make out when in dead silence "I'm moaning Myrtle" came from the TV. Moment ruined. I got cock blocked by a fictional ghost
I wanted to waterboard myself with beer, but no one would give me their shirt to do it.
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