accomplished twins. life is a go
i have more money on itunes than i do in my bank account... college.
I opened my browser to a doctor page titled "serious pain under left side of ribcage". Last night must have been healthy.
We found you on the floor drooling you kept saying over and over how you were double jointed.
He doesn't need to speak English. He needs to speak sex.
I didn't scare your mother by showing up on the roof, did I?
I was trying to chase her off the carpet, but now there are figure-eights of cat vomit. everywhere
I'll feed you vitamin c from my mouth this weekend. Like a baby bird.
Promise??
ok, i suppose pissing your pants could be considered a wardrobe malfunction.
Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god.
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
i like beer, sex, and cooking. what more can he want?
On a scale of 1 to 10 how good of an idea would it be to pregame at the airport right now
Ten
Randomize
