More tranny stories later!
we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
Sometimes I wonder how you ever made friends then I remember it's because you blew your way to semi-relevance
It's like you are the superhero of getting jizzed on
I can hear my parents having sex. I REPEAT. I CAN HEAR MY PARENTS HAVING SEX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!
Your mom is 55 and has MS. To be honest, I'm proud of her, and you should be too, bitch.
I just want you to know that we eye fucked the shit out of someone who just got drafted
Because its Monday... And I'm determined to just be drunk for the rest of the semester
The funny part was that the cop pulled us over cause the park was closed, not because I had just come up from giving the guy a blowjob when the cop drove by.
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
I can only get day drunk because of my medicine now, so... There's that
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
I shaved my entire vagina for a man who had the personality of a potato and a C- orgasm. Life is a series of disappointments.
Dude she passed out on the floor so you covered her with a blanket to make sure "no one would notice her"
And when she started moving around and making noises you told everyone, "it's okay, it's just my roomba under there".......
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