did I really admit that id have sex with that cougar had I been more drunk?...ugh...i need to masterbate more
I let some guy put hot sauce in my asshole for his birthday
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
some guy just walked up to the bench i was on, backflipped off of it, gave me his number and walked away....i love this city
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
you're like that jamaican tarat card reading chick... only with herpes
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
SHE GRABBED MY FULLY ERECT DICK IN A BAR AND STUCK HER TONGUE DOWN MY THROAT AND I COULD NOT CLOSE
You would think that me seductively unzipping my cat feetie pajamas would make him want to fuck me.
Everybody needs breakup sex. You just happened to get yours from a dude who hasn't reached the point of breakup yet. No biggie.
Good. Sleepy. In the middle of a pregnancy scare. The usual.
I couldn't break up with him while I was wearing a Hakuna Matata shirt.
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
THEY HAVE BEEN GOING AT IT FOR 2 HOURS AND I HEAR THEM BANGING THIS IS BULLSHIT
i had to flash a cab last night.
did it work?
No. he slowed down but then kept going. story of my life.
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