He is either going to be in my pants or get a restraining order against me.
I swear to God, I saw my life flash between my legs.
My vagina is in bus station locker number 1465.You can go talk to it if u like -in the mean time I’m going 2show up drunk and embarrass u at work.
my life is in even more shambles than last time, mcdonalds is closed
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
My judgement was not "clouded". My judgement was in the midst of a fucking hurricane or something ridiculous.
Technically he's married but he says it's "not like that" even tho his wife lives with him. Not sure if I believe him but I'm sleeping with him anyway.
I just compared his sexting to a plate of spaghetti. And he STILL wants to sleep with me.
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
I had so much stripper lotion and body glitter on my glasses I had a hard time driving home.
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
I wanna snuggle with you as we feed each other chipotle burrito bowls and that's just where I'm at right now
I was masturbating and a roofer walked past my bedroom window.
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
Randomize
