yeah for some reason your penis didn't fit in my mouth the other day
i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
where's my purse there's an important taco in it
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
The liquor store manager told us to drink responsible as we checked out and we laughed to his face. Like we're buying karkov at noon, responsibility is out of the question
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
Nursing home in NJ just got busted for prostitution and drugs...dropping off my deposit tomorrow
Please write a memoir and name it "Game Boy and Dick Stuff"
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
Man i fell asleep on a random persons porch on the way home and woke up to the family banging on the windows trying to wake me up
I dont have to work tomorrow im yelling gibberish at squirrels
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
Drunk sperm are not productive sperm.
Randomize
