Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
My mom just admitted you were a good looking kid & if you weren't my friend & 30 years older she would do you. I'm going to commit suicide.
I've never felt so epic in my entire life as I do right now, my bare testicles staring down the ocean itself
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
I'm told I threw my cigarettes at the TV one by one Shouting about the cast of Community.
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
IF I CANT STRIP TO SANTA BABY THEN WHY EVEN HAVE CHRISTMAS.
in other news i got caramel vodka poured on me. upside, i smell amazing
if happy hour never ends, you’ll never have to eat kale
Fucking a younger guy is now a game of odds. The chance that he gives me corona virus is outweighed by the evening of orgasms I know he’ll give me.
Got baked and laid and ate baked lays when I laid down while baking the brownies I I’m Superman
You’re still high, aren’t you?
Oh yeah
Randomize
