She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
Currently bar hopping with 30 Navy SEALS. I know i'm safe but damn its hard to pick up chicks when you feel like a big pussy.
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
You fell asleep leaning on my shoulder at the bar
Need help. Super baked. Stuck on couch. Dying of thirst. Bring paint thinner or something to pry me off. Only thumbs and neck work.
Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more.
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
There's hot sauce all over my mirror, lamp shade and dresser. Also it's your turn for weed
Hey do you have any hot friends that would settle for less?
There's no way I'm ready for marriage. I have too many pics of other guys' junk on my phone for an eternal commitment right now.
He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.
At least he's honest about how long he'll last.
Randomize