theres a dog humping me and im not going to stop it... i really need to get laid.
idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
I mean it was his birthday. How was I supposed to tell him he could not wear a sombrero while we bang.
You definitely in your drunken state were really concerned you would forget to buy milk today
Please rescue me. but take your time, im getting pizza
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
That's the fall semester you first snorted drugs off my ass I think
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
wtf why is there glitter all over my dog
Oh yeah, it was definitely the best sex of my life, I just don't think I can fix the kitchen table before my parents get back...
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
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