After last night, I could never be a politician.
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
Oh, and trying to figure out who wants to do Molly in a frat is like asking damn children if they want puppies and candy. So just bring as much as possible.
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
The cat likes watching me spank Michael. I don’t know how to feel about this.
Just because you haven’t had your UTI yet doesn’t mean you have a right to talk like Yoda
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