Hey sorry for feelin' up your date. Sadly, this is a mass txt.
He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
i forgot to tell you that olivia sent me a text yesterday that the mormon girl got caught with weed in her vagina at school
The grocery store is a combo of ghetto ppl complaining that the low fat chips are all that's left and hipsters trying to eat organic during the hurricane
I made him leave at 3am, he texted me a couple minutes later and said the elevator was broken and he was sleeping in there, but he said I was worth it so I don't feel guilty
Found out I slept with someone who likes Pitbull. I really should get to know someone better before I sleep with them.
"I vaguely remember the Health and Safety Inspector walking into my room this morning while I was passed out naked. That's one way to get it over with quickly."
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
Remember when I got punched in the face on NYE last year? I don't
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
I gave you chlamydia, you gave me a concussion. Now we're even.
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
Sorry for peeing on your books last night. I wouldn't leave them next to the window anymore.
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
Randomize
