I'm gonna start referring to my vag as my ladygarden
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
My boogers are black from last night. So that's either from all the colored hairspray or inhaling all of the tragedy from the party...
Eating hibachi. The chef is squirting sake into my mouth with a ketchup bottle. Happened twice, more to come.
Remember the time we were horrifically hung over, went to mcdonalds, an you merely felt the weight of the mcnuggets box and knew there was an extra?
like it was yesterday
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
Hey. There is naked girl with "plz don't touch her. She just turned 21" sharpied on her chest. What happened last night?
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
you gave me money for the cab and then walked home..
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
He told me my car had really nice leather seats right before he jizzed all over them.
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