So yesterday I was on craigslist and I saw a listing for a sofa-cum-bed. I knew what they meant...
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
decision: in honor of being in new orleans this weekend all my drunk texts will be en francais
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
It's astonishing how many Ludacris lyrics you know
Tip of the day: Don't Amazon vibrators when your WHOLE FAMILY uses your prime account. There's dildo after dildo showing up in my "Related to Items You've Viewed" category on the home page.
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
Omg there's puke under my pillow. Clearly I puked and tried to hide it. From myself. \n
Just reached for my phone in my non existant pocket while it was in my hand.
I’m a lady. I promise I won’t oogle your junk when we go skinny dipping.
Our sex sesh was interrupted by a bunch of hobos fighting outside his apartment.
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