"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
Who the hell brings a 6pack to a party. I'm trying to make mistakes.
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
You fought the bouncer and lost, then challenged a hobo to a 40 chugging contest and lost. Sobriety is a good life choice.
fat chick, vomit on the dog, and three unidentifiable pills in my ear. all in the same ear. what the hell happened after the guests showed up?
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
I mean I feel like if you explain to the emoji app company that your friend got plastered and fell to the ground and is trying to scheme her way back to normal life and get her dignity back they would understand just how necessary it is to have a fingers crossed emoji...
It's sitting in bleach right now. You will be the creepiest coolest dude in my book if you made a bracelet from my tooth.
There's a woman at the bar holding a baby with one arm and doing shots of GM with the other. The baby is crying. I have lost faith in humanity.
Btw I don't have words to express my appreciation at how many times you've had to be on a dirty bar bathroom floor for me in the past two weeks
You kept insisting you found queso that's better than oral sex
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
I don't think it's a coincidence that the day I just happen to do the splits at the gym I come back with 7 guys' phone numbers.
Randomize
