We met on a dual walk of shame. It has to be love, we can't let that go to waste. I want to tell our children that story.
They had some plan b on the table between the beer and the guacamole. Yeah, it's gonna be a fun party.
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
Ok, Jen and I are going out tonight and getting rowdy. I think you and Steph need to come. I understand if you can't, but not going out means you're automatically obligated to post bail. If necessary.
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
It was like a Thanksgiving meal, which you spend 8 hours cooking, and the family wolfs down in 20 minutes. All that flirting and build-up for like 90 seconds of pumping and he was gone in a flash, never to be heard from again.
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
This kid wants me to stop partying. Like I have only known you for 5 days. Chill.
The dog peed on the neighbors baby Jesus. No wonder she thinks we're the devil.
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