real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
I would go down on you faster than GM stock
I saw a girl walking around campus with bandages on both her knees. I need to get her number.
My passouts and memory loss are great training for when I have alzheimers. You'll know where to look when I get lost.
He started telling people I was Stephen Hawking's son. When that didnt fly he switched to Tony Romo's cousin
I'll never forget how blunt of a wingman you were. "Excuse me, my friend wants to makeout with someone"
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
He stole all of his parent's vodka WHILE they were in the room, and then opened the window and snuck out. I was watching from my truck
I LOVE YOU NO MATTER HOW MANY BALLS YOUVE SUCKED
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
Wait..I'm drunk and butt naked making a pizza. Happy Wednesday.
the next thing I knew, I was on the floor of a Tim Hortons bathroom in Canada.
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
Randomize
