yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
Why do I have flashes of a dark shed in my memory?
Because we had sex in one.
She said her hobbies include bangin guys on one night stands and then sending them facebook relationship requests the next morning just to freak em out
Bad breakup?
He posted a pic of me fully naked and smiling as he inserted a carrot into my vagina as my FB profile pic and then changed the PW, locking me out of my own account. So 500 of my closest friends, family, and coworkers now have that mental image of me on FB.
i seriously haven't spoken to him since i drunk dialed him and told him i loved his beard
i need to stop meeting underage girls and letting them into the bar. i mean yea its a surefire way to get laid without having to tell them I'm 26 but i feel like as a bouncer I'm focusing on all the wrong things
I accidentally called my professor daddy...and I think he liked it. Help, I'm scared.
Was banging my ex last night when his roommate walked in... We kept going. #goaheadandwatch
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
I pour the whiskey from now on
I'm pretty sure she tried to draw a self portrait out of her vomit. Then you tried to help, but passed out in the vomit.
Nothing ruins your day more than waking up to you dogs crotch in your face
Randomize
