so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
Just got a blowjob on the pier where my great-grandfather entered America.
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
Fuck I am starving. I don't think I've eaten in the past two days.
You didnt need to. Gin is like eggs, its a perfectly nutrionally balanced meal.
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
I'm a bit broke right now... Would it be OK if I pay you in champagne and Xanax?
I had a dream he was standing in front of me naked and flexing while yelling VICTORY and gizzing all over the floor.
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
The police report said i was screaming at someone that wasnt there, then the cops told me to call someone sober and i called mike to tell him "They are trying to arrest me for stealing information from the FBI" at that point they took me to jail.
Remind me to NEVER AGAIN mix beer with tequila with beer with whiskey with vodka with rum with vodka.
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
I'm just glad you didn't end up in Staten Island
I woke up naked holding a taco. My ass couldn't even make it to my bed let alone Staten Island
I was stuffing my face while buying a brownie and coffee and some kid I fucked came up behind me and said. Someone's hungry.
Randomize
