do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
I'm quitting my job and I'm just going to become a professional drunk girls mistake.
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
Lets go see if some hobos will give us a prostate massage for a 40 ounce.
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
I dont even think your gonna like what I got you for christmas. If not we can take it back and get drugs.
Some guy I've never met before just came outside and started rolling a blunt on our fence and passed it around to all six of us. At eight in the morning. Today's gonna be weird.
I didn't know that all of his brothers would be hot and musical too. That's a dick move on behalf of biology.
i woke up with blood and cuts on my face and i don't remember anything after winning four games of beer pong in a row last night. and i'm still drunk.
you are a true champion. bear my children.
Congratulations! We have a period
I just found an old slice of LIME in my wallet?????????
Jesus better clutch that motherfucking wheel, then.
I'M NOT PUTTING MY TRUST IN JESUS! I'M PUTTING MY TRUST IN YOU!
Well, fuck this election. I'm getting drunk, regardless of who wins.
Randomize
