are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
I don't know what's worse, the fact that my parents own a sex swing or the fact that my little cousin was playing on it
i was on the fence about his sexual orientation until he referred to his marlboro loghts as "carrie bradshaws"
could you please explain to me why my jumper cables are on my bedroom floor?
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
He professed his love for me while I danced on a picnic table with a bottle of Absolut. I said thank you and walked away.
I'm in a waiting room at the hospital - and there's a dude here who is WAY too proud of his urine sample.
I won the booty shaking contest by mooning the whole bar
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
can't believe I traded a good night's sleep and a midterm for your blurry tits
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
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