hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
He fingered me while we both sang the fresh prince theme song.
Marry him
did we hook up?
no, because you kept repeating "itty bitty titties" when i took off my shirt
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
the chick you hooked up with on my couch facebook friended me.
just thought you should know her name is kristen
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
Sometimes I have to make sure these messages are going to you and I'm not about to give someone in my phone book a heart attack.
you showed up at my door at 3am, handed me a bag of cold chicken nuggets and said "lead me to the non-irish Siobhans," do YOU think you were tripping?
If I ever look like I'm about to have a repeat of last night, hit me. Just smack me as hard as you can.
I was on antibiotics for a bladder infection and couldn't drink and you told me there was no longer room in your life for me.
Yay I only have ONE giant mystery bruise from yesterday
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
Randomize
