ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
She said that I needed to "pregame her so it can slip right in."
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
Was I really yelling "girls night" at random chicks before stealing and drinking all their shots?
I feel that it is my duty to the human race to invent a colon squeegy
I'm such a good drunk match marker. You single, you single... Drunk friend meet single boy. BOOM illegitimate baby made!
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.
As soon as we had sex he stopped opening doors for me. That wasn't an exchange. Im still a god damn princess
I've never had to kick an employee out of bed to go to work before.
I just tripped over a but plug that was on the floor. It's 430 in the morning
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
I don't think getting eaten out in a smart car behind a circle-k on my break by a guy I just met classifies as social distancing, but I'm beginning to love night shift more and more.
Randomize
