i found you on the dancefloor with your cell phone to your ear saying that you didn't like the music they played at the club so you were going to listen to your own
who knew that if you vomit while skydiving the puke goes up towards the people that are behind you.
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
Screw it. I'll show up in a white dress with a sign that says " I fucked the groom and it wasn't that great."
You refused to come over and kept yelling that you were gonna sleep on a car
by "whatever happens, happens" i meant "we are totally hooking up again on tuesday." i thought that was obvious.
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
What kind of gift says: "I love you because you're my mom & I'm obligated to, but I don't like you" ?
I made a Russian puke. I outdrank a Russian. I am unstoppable.
I'm having salsa con queso and a leftover half-drank/flat red bull for breakfast. Nothing you propose doing today would be a downgrade.
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
We've been watching Scooby Doo and having sex for the past 36 hours, so life is great
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
OK... But I need to shower first because I'm covered in stuff I definitely shouldn't have slept in
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
Randomize
