I can only date guys with blackberrys
I just decided its a new prereq to talk to me
Rescue me. My white trash great uncle just pulled out his belly at the restaurant to show us how big this woman's tit was
I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
college drinking is stealing all my money, thank god planned parenthood is somewhat free
the trash is collected at 5:50 on mondays. i was up puking all night and heard them
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
dude, boobs are like the porridge in goldylocks
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
The moral of the story is this:the last shot of the night is always a mistake
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
Randomize
