I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
we sat in the hammock and pretended we were skydiving for three hours. jack actually started crying when i convinced him his chute didnt open.
I just saw a kid drop his lollipop on the floor of best buy, kick it because he was pissed off and then pick it up and eat it. I think I have a long lost son.
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
My mom just told me to make sure my face isn't on the front cover of the newspaper on 4/21. Challenge accepted
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
You should really trust me on this one. "hit it and quit it" might not be the best career move on your part...
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
I just finished packing for spring break, took me 4 minutes. To be fair though I only put my trunks, a pair of underwear, and 50 condoms in my bag.
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
I smoked then listened to a voicemail from my mom...I ended up yelling at my phone cause she wasn't answering me. Forgot it was a recording.
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
I puked.
Twice.
So is that a yes?
Randomize
