afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
I distinctly recall there being a "I can't be dead 2maro" stipulation to going out last night. There's been a breech of contract
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
I want to miss work tomorrow on account of violent projective vomit... Make it happen
So this 40 year old woman was trying to bring me into the bathroom to blow me and the bartender called the cops on her because she was showing her tits. Only in asbury.
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
guy at the bar just asked how many cows we have on our land, then proceeds to ask me out. you know your from the country when....
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
So he cheated on his gf again. For the third time. Second time with me. HE CRIED WHILE DRIVING ME HOME BECAUSE HE CHEATED ON HER. And I laughed the entire way. Good god I'm an asshole.
no offense but you looked like shit yesterday
tequila is unforgiving..
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