I took off my bra and money fell out...how crazy was I tonight?
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
My family is watching Intervention and taking notes. I need to leave NOW!
Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
Nothing brings people closer than bonding over tequila shots and running from campus security.
You should have totally come, I started watering down vodka with cider. I have lost the sense of taste.
I think my greatest accomplishment today was probably using a bottle opener to get the cap off my fourth drink while holding the cat WITHOUT dropping him.
Oh god, what has my life become?
Wellp yesterday was spent absurdly hungover and today was spent in planned parenthood so I hope that's not an indication of the year to come
Hey by the way did you notice my third nipple in my snapchat
He yelled "I'm Bruce Springsteen!" when he came. This is why I don't sleep with guys from Jersey.
There's a Japanese guy here dressed as a Viking who just screamed "wats up cocksluts" and kicked a guy in the face. come get me out of here.
Hey I just woke up in the back of a pickup truck parked at taco bell... Can u come get me?
my grocery cart consisted of hershey bars, sour patch kids, starbursts, mayo, 4 frozen pizzas, 4 lunchables, and chips. clearly, i can't do this on my own.
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
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