can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
I have 11 glasses of water and one beer on the table infront of me. Have to keep going to different bartends to get more. There are only two though and I think they've caught on
when i spit it made a heart shape. i think it's a sign
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
Dude in front of me just jumped out of line at Starbucks to go puke. Vegas in prime form.
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
I've been smelling a baby wipe for three minutes. I didn't think I was that drunk but I guess I am
At some point i could of swore that you were in my bedroom riding a manatee last night..... I like my new dealer
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
I'm so high I would give anything in the world to be inside my lava lamp right now
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
You know.... I ordered the nipple clamps when I was drunk. But on further consideration, THANKS DRUNK ME I LIKE WHATS HAPPENING
he puked in the sink and didnt turn off the water before he passed out on the bathroom floor. its been 2 hrs and we finally noticed that the whole fucking house is flooded. to hell with this birthday party
Sober me admires drunk me's enthusiasm, but there is no way I'm going to make it out there today.
Lol drunk you is so full ideas and happy. Sober you is full of grumpy reality.
Randomize
