I went out, and slept with my sunglasses on
I think I'm going to be in trouble for sneaking out last night. My Dad saw me drive up this morning when he was leaving early for work.
What'd you say?
I told him I was sleep driving
In Vegas, have spent the last 48 hours wearing a viking helmet and fanny pack. I consider this to be a career high since drinking is my career
I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
Subtly mention that I'm not a lesbian. I would only go for rebecca's nipples because they're pierced and I like shiny things.
I don't care if I just threw up. You kiss me now. This is marriage.
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
But seriously who drew a dick on a tortilla and nailed it to the door?
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
I got your flops too. But yeah you rolled off your raft a bunch of times so we had to ask the white trash squad to help you back on. You bit one of them
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
Randomize
