What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
Facials are how you say "I love you" in porn star.
You'd think after all these years of evolution that it would be longer than a golf pencil.
you thought you were invisible so you started narrating your actions.
I gave ten strangers a full description of his penis and its abilities. I need to stop drinking.
His rich uncle has six months to live. I feel pregnant.
Just got invited out of group to take shots after hearing her gay friend say "why would I give him my alcohol so you can suck his dick. It's going to be a good night
I take back all the times I've said life was unfair. I'm about to have two trained bartenders for a girlfriend and roommate
I have a diplomatic trade for you. My pants for your rum. Tomorrow?
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
I can't help you right now because I'm shaving my feet...like a lady.
I just took a service station dump so foul I had to buy gas out of guilt
I just remembered that the guy I slept with last night has "USDA PRIME" tattooed on his ass
Lobby closes at 2 AM on Thursday, but everyone walking still wants food... I could run a "Taco Bell Taxi" when I clock off at 2 and charge a dollar to give drunks a ride through drive thru.
Someones thought of a way to afford tuition.
IT WAS A FUCKING ELEPHANT I SWESR!!!!!
Nathan, I haven't spoken to you in 12 years and it's 6am. Kindly fuck off.
Randomize