I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
i upgraded from drunk texts to drunk e-mails...real world here i come
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
Someone just got kicked out of the mall for being dressed like a giant cat. I feel like this is in your future.
You kept mumbling that you could become one with the carpet as you proceeded to give yourself the worst carpet burn I have ever seen
Men are not even allowed to look at you without a condom on.
Yo if you blacked out last night, careful going through your purse. There's cocaine in a lollipop wrapper.
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
I mean, it's just pathetic when the standard is tinder and he can't live up to it.
Can we make love to the Space Jam soundtrack?
when your dumb AF ex “accidentally” venmos you $50 and texts you asking for it back..... —sorry I accidentally deleted your number and cashed out
Randomize
